Chapter 11 - Daniel Asked Him One Question
Daniel agreed to one mediated conversation with Cornelius.
No Ethan.
No private room.
Attorneys present.
I went because Daniel asked me to.
Cornelius looked twenty years older.
He started with:
“I should not have restrained Ethan.”
Daniel waited.
“It was wrong.”
Still Daniel said nothing.
“I lost my temper.”
Daniel finally spoke.
“That’s not why we’re here.”
Cornelius glanced toward me.
Then away.
Daniel placed the fertility consent on the table.
“You asked Uncle Victor.”
Cornelius’s jaw tightened.
“Yes.”
“You wanted me.”
“Yes.”
“You signed this.”
“Yes.”
“You named me.”
“Yes.”
Daniel’s voice cracked.
“So when did I become something you were ashamed of?”
Cornelius looked down.
For the first time, there was no prepared answer.
Finally:
“When people found out I couldn’t…”
He stopped.
“Couldn’t what?”
“Have children.”
Daniel waited.
Cornelius whispered:
“I felt defective.”
Daniel’s eyes filled.
“So you made me carry it?”
“No.”
“Yes.”
Cornelius shook his head.
“I loved you.”
“I know.”
That surprised him.
Daniel continued:
“You keep thinking that clears everything.”
“I was your father.”
“You are my father.”
Present tense.
Cornelius started crying.
Daniel did too.
Then:
“That’s why this is worse.”
Cornelius covered his face.
Daniel asked the question he had come for.
“Why Ethan?”
Cornelius answered eventually.
“He was becoming soft.”
I almost stood.
Daniel touched my wrist.
Let him finish.
Cornelius said:
“You let him cry over everything. You let him talk back. He needed discipline.”
“He was six.”
“I was trying to keep him from becoming—”
Cornelius stopped.
Daniel completed it.
“Me?”
Silence.
That was the answer.
Daniel sat back.
“You spent my whole life trying to punish the part of yourself you saw in me.”
“No.”
“And when Ethan loved me without caring whose DNA I had, you punished him too.”
Cornelius had no response.
Daniel stood.
“I hope you get help.”
Cornelius looked up.
“For us?”
“No.”
May you like
Daniel swallowed.
“For whoever you are when nobody is left to control.”
